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The Optimism Paradox

*Please note, the person writing this, is a natural born optimist and has nothing against pessimists, optimists, realists, or any other type of -ist*

It has been a while since I have posted an article so I felt that I should share some of my thoughts after an experience I had recently. A conversation that I had with a friend spurred some deep thought on my part regarding this wonderful and sometimes paralyzing paradox of optimism or hope.

Before I get into details on my thoughts, let me share with you what I have personally experienced and also what I see others experience. First, my own story.


The friend I was speaking about had a relationship just end that was similar to one of my own a few years ago.

You know the kind or maybe you have been in one yourself? The one where one of the two of you gives more, bends backwards, walks on egg shells, is more unselfish, and does everything they can for the other person, all while the other person takes more, is more self centered, and ultimately not fulfilling to the giving one. This friend of mine was dating a guy who is and was a good guy, but she found herself empty, unfulfilled, and frustrated with his selfish nature and self-absorption that led to her leaving him, even though she invested so much.

For me, a few years ago, I dated a girl for quite a long time that I adored. She was s